Fairy Xmas – The Celebrations That Never Came

It was already all Christmas despite that day is just the 20th of December. Everywhere bubbled with the crowd and we found a simple corner to sit. It was a moderate bar inside the national stadium at Surulere, Lagos. I was still observing the crowd when my phone rang.

“What’s up baby, are you still coming?” I asked Tessy.

“Yes babe,” she said. “But I need you to transfer 600 Naira worth of airtime for me to complete my airtime. I want to use a part of it to subscribe the monthly data of 1Gig for 1000 Naira, and the other one to call you when I get there. I have just 600 Naira worth of airtime already on my phone”

“Should I transfer it to this number?” I asked.

“No bae, transfer it to my other line that I use for my browsing” She responded

“I’m on it,” I said as I quickly brought out my phone, but forgot I didn’t have the numbers.

“Oh Shit, I don’t have that her phone number” I quickly called her back…

“Can you call out that other phone number for me?” I asked

“Ok bae, I will,” she said. I quickly called Jide to come close to use his phone to take down the numbers.

“Alright, call it now”

Jide took down the numbers and there was no time for confirmation. The dim lights around the venue were enough for him to see what he typed on his phone.

“Alright call out the numbers for me,” I asked Jide.

He called them out as I quickly typed in the figures I thought were necessary. I followed all the instruction prompts before hitting the send button.

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After a while, I waited for a debit confirmation from my bank. I later got a text message which read “Thank You” as a response.

“Alright, I think she got it” I whispered to Jide.

I already ordered some drinks to keep ourselves together, while we waited for the grand entry of Tessy. The waiters were all nice and professional, and I had no trouble with the quality of their services.

“Why isn’t she here still,” Jide asked after a while “You have to call her again” He suggested

I brought out my phone and dialled her digits.

“You didn’t get what?” I asked

“You know what, let me resend another. Airtime shouldn’t be our issue here” I said before terminating the call and looking down on my phone.

It was a message from my bank.

“Acct: 217***254

DT: 12/20/2017: 6:39 PM

MC Loc Artym Trnsf

Wdl-000405201904 – 58B, A

DR Amt: NGN60,000.00



Bank the Eazy Way with *966#”

My eyes were wide open. Saliva dropped out of my open mouth. I was starting to fell poo getting out of my trousers.

“Jide… come first” I managed to say after I regained my voice “What does this mean?”

“Was I debited or credited” I followed up with another question as Jide held onto my phone with his hands shaking.

“Which number did you send it to?” He asked

“The one you called out to me” I responded

We crosschecked the numbers once more and behold…


“Have you tried the number again?”

“It isn’t reachable”

“Oh, it is now switched off,” Jide said again.

Just then, Tessy walked in… “Is this how you use to do?” She queried in a low voice. I didn’t know how to make the explanation. I was still in the middle of looking out for how to explain when a guy came around and offered her a dance.

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“My boyfriend is here,” She said

“When he is ready, he will come pick you up,” The man said. I turned around to ask Jide how we were going to escape from here, and he was nowhere to be found.

“What??” I screamed!

I turned around to follow suit, and I saw the waiter asking me for my payment. “Can we just step inside?” I requested.


I got a new yellow T-shirt as a result of serving drinks, washing plates, trays and picking bottles for 3 nights. I would have escaped beforehand, but the bouncer attached to me was scarier than I could imagine.

25th of December came, and it was truly a big day in the house of the lord. I attended one of the church camp meetings, and I just finished eating my Christmas beans.

Not bad for a start…


“Why aren’t you celebrating Christmas?” Someone asked me

“Christmas celebration is for Pagans”

Not a bad answer for a broke guy.

The End… what happens next?

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